Hand-wringing = stop
–what if you let God decide how to help you, instead of asking for what you want done in your life–
So this is from an earlier post (a homily the day before I found out I was pregnant with this 2nd miracle). I need to stop the handwringing. I just need to let go and let God. Show me the path. Let this unfold before me. Let me embrace even things that scare me now. Let me walk through the next open door. Let me change how I need to change. Let me just let go and let God show me the way.
Don’t worry about what others think. Just let God show me the way and walk that path that He illuminates.
Filed under Everyday Life | Comment (0)Sunday is a day of nest
Laundry. Mountains of it (I’m not the only one who piles clean, unfolded laundry on the couch in hopes of enticing someone to fold it!) But I got it all folded, and in parts, I got it all put away, too! So we have a laundry-free couch, a relatively toy-free living room and a playroom you can sit on the couch in. Success! Tonight, a quick wipe-over of the bathrooms (I’m too tired to do heavy cleaning right now) and dishes and I’ll call it ‘housecleaning monday – Lite’.
I am nesting, for sure, but it’s a good thing. Getting organized, it’s a good thing!
Filed under Everyday Life | Comment (0)Beautiful spring
Just what I wished for…a gorgeous spring. It’s gotten back to normal (60s) and the flowers are coming out on the trees, and budding is going on everywhere. I feel like I could go to my 9th month, and I hope I do. My last 7 weeks of pregnancy (probably ever) and I really want to savor them. The minor things – aches and pains, being tired, the injections – they pale in comparison to feeling our son in my belly, rolling around, poking his hands and feet up to meet me. I’m enjoying some hot tea, while peanut watches a video, and I get ready for my day (Friday). This weekend, I plan to sew some things for myself, and to get ready for the new baby’s arrival.
I’m turning ever inward now, and I like that feeling. Of closing my arms around my family and my home, about feathering my nest, preparing for life with another child. I never thought I’d have ONE child, let alone two! And let alone getting this – a pregnancy without (much) fanfare. But it is as I’ve imagined it.
There’s a crow outside cawing, and E is downstairs doing her rendition of it 
What a beautiful morning, what a beautiful life.
feathering the nest
Part of the nest feathering is money. I know babies bring with them their own financial gifts, universally-speaking, but I am feeling the need to be making money – more of it, both at work and in my hobbies.
So I book marked a couple of books I’ll try to find at my interlibrary loan (because saving money is as good as making it!) I’ve had, on hold, a great idea for a while, and it’s time to really make it happen. Right at the moment, I think there’s a hand-washing project that needs to happen (a handbag, that needs photographing, that I’ve used a lot and it’s a bit grubby, LOL). See, I use my own stuff at least.
Anyway, I think this is all feathering of the nest, too.
Filed under Everyday Life | Comment (0)How long does nesting take?
I don’t recall. Maybe it’s not too soon for this to happen. But it’s clearly here. I’ve had an insatiable urge to organize baby gear, clothes, slings, the room…and clean: the kitchen, the kitchen bar, laundry, the stove. I’ve contemplated washing windows. G. has been planting (we’re done, except for our garden). I must slow down a smidge at least, to rest. I’m achy in the perineal/lower back region, too, so that makes me nervous. I think I’ll go lay down and read a magazine, even though I really want to run around the house and straighten up!
Filed under Everyday Life | Comment (0)crabby
tonight I was crabby. And mean, to my toddler. There’s no excuse for this. I went back in, hugged her for a long time and caressed her face in apology. She kept asking “everything’s fine, mama?” Everything’s OK? Yea, peanut, it is fine.
I am feeling overwhelmed in some ways. I would very much like some time to myself and soon. I just feel this need to retreat. I bought fabric today for baby shower gifts for a second cousin, and nighties for myself. Stylish ones. I have other baby shower gifts to buy but that’s a few more weeks away, for a good friend. I am thinking she’ll get a Moby and the Baby Book and something off her shower list.
This anger I have sometimes, this baby feels it. I must stop that. Hubby did NOT step up and I should just have left and gone somewhere I couldn’t hear the antics from toddler. Mama time out. Instead I felt violent, angry and mean. Not good for any one of us, least of all this child in my body.
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