Waiting for baby

Boy, this is at once amazing and crazy.  A year ago, almost, G. lost his job. And we thought we’d never get this house. But I had a vision of the future – and  it involved me, pregnant, at this house, walking down the deck stairs to a burgeoning garden. Indeed, I did just that, tonight, on a hot night, to clip lettuce leaves for our dinner salad. I’m waiting. I’m both sad pregnancy is ending, and glad a new phase is beginning. Glad to be starting my motherhood life again with a newborn. But still, sad. Pregnancy is such a special time in life. It’s been so joyful (yes, the first few months were hard, but the rest have been beautiful). I don’t know how long I have – I think maybe the better part of several days. I don’t think it will be this weekend – and he may surprise all of us and go to our due date, next Sunday, Father’s Day.

Yes, not everything is done (not even close!) but neither does it seem urgent. I mainly want to get the laundry put away tomorrow, and move my computer downstairs for the summer. Organize my nursing tops (the ones that I have that my friend M. has not borrowed.) Wait for baby. I have contractions on and off but they are not regularly spaced yet, so I think my body is just getting ready, but not yet there. Definitely more these last few days than earlier in the week. It’ll be soon but not THAT soon, I think.

It has been SUCH a lovely journey, this pregnancy. I have so loved it and have felt so blessed to have done this again. A son is on the way. We are so incredibly fortunate, for all that we have and all that we can do.

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